I am not attracted to black men. I'm just not. God knows I've tried, cause let's face it, Allen Iverson is effin smokin'! But when it comes to my wandering eyes at da club, most of the time, I automatically dismiss black guys. Does that make me a racist? Perhaps. Probably. Yes, I think so. This self-labeled racism only exacerbates my already seething white-urban-guilt, which living in Philadelphia, a city that is nearly predominantly black, kinda limits my options for mates. Now let me be clear: just because I am not attracted to black guys sexually, does not mean I'm not attracted to them personally or intellectually. I take great pride in and love the overwhelming diversity among my social circle, I just don't wanna bone the black dudes. Simple.
So, being a middle-class white guy, how do I reconcile my sexual disinterest in more than 45% of my city's population with my
But only if the asker is black. If you're a white dude asking me for a cigarette, you'd have better luck getting a yamulke at a christian book store. Now, we are all familiar with the joy that comes to me when I'm offered small bits of change to "buy" a cigarette off me, but the main reason why I NEVER take the money is because I am compensating for my racist sexual distaste. Yeah, that's how I roll. If you're black and want a cigarette, just find me, I'll probably even give you "one for the road" too, just to quell my white-devil guilt.
Now, to those of you who may be saying, "what the fuck, Samsom? You're just a racist dick!"
I say, "No, kindly reader, I'm not a racist dick. I just have one."
